Due to the ineffable unpredictability of life, our Postmaster General Thaddeus is not able to provide the masses with his usual stirring rhetoric. And so, that most insurmountable of tasks falls to me, Garviel. Also known as ‘The Other One”.

At times one finds one’s self confronted by an object in one’s refrigerator who’s existence can not be explained by anything other than a proclivity for laziness. Leftovers are quite often the object of such tendencies. I once found a mass (for to call it a food stuff would be a gross overestimation of its nature) that I was positive was at some point in history a fruit of some sort, most likely an orange. I was assured later by my wife that it was, in fact, a cantaloupe. Or, at any rate, the dessicated husk of a cantaloupe. I had no recollection of placing a cantaloupe in my fridge at any time in recent history, and yet, there sat a testament to its once-life. I’m not a huge fan of cantaloupe, but my heart still felt a twinge of sorrow for the fate that I had incurred upon it.

So please, clean out your fridge once in a while.